What is the truth about you?

Confidence and self esteem are tricky subjects. What makes some people confident and others not so? What factors contribute to high self esteem or can drag our esteem into the gutter? Why is it so easy to spot low self esteem in others but not to recognise it in ourselves?

The fact is, how we view ourselves, how much self worth we have and how we project that through our level of confidence, is a major factor in our success and happiness. It's what everyone else sees in us. So it makes sense to get to grips with this.

A couple of years ago in one of my early coaching session with my then coach Helen Saunders, she asked me this incredibly powerful question;

What is the the truth about you that you are scared others will find out?

Think about it.

What is it that you secretly fear about yourself that you are worried others might discover?

The answer to this will be the starting point for raising your self esteem.

Master, servant, or both?

I was listening to an audiobook yesterday, of Stephen Covey's 7 habits of Highly Effective People. One of the things he said really sparked something within me. I can't remember his exact words so this is VERY paraphrased, but basically, he explained how there is no better thing in life that to put yourself in the service of others. And I thought about this and realised how true this is. I am essentially a SERVANT!

Now, when I was a little girl, no way did I want to grow up to be a servant! they were those people in black and white uniforms who said yes m'lady, no m'lady etc...so what does SERVICE mean?

Well, think back to the last time you did something, in a totally selfless way, for someone else. This could be something as minor as making a cuppa for a colleague, or something anonymous like giving blood, or something much bigger. Felt good didn't it? Now taking the cuppa example, think of the last time you made yourself a cuppa - give you a buzz? thought not.

Doing things for others and trying to make life better for others is a really easy way to make your life more meaningful, more fun, just bigger, richer and juicier. being mean never made anyone happy.

Being a servant isn't an indication of status. You can be the MD of your own multi national company (I wish!) and still be a servant to all of your employees. You can work to serve them with exciting projects, a safe and happy working environment, a real purpose and reason to get out of bed in the morning. No matter who you are, or what you do, you can be a servant.

And this doesn't mean giving up your own wants and needs, you have to serve them also. And after all, the being good to others, being helpful, polite, thoughtful, taking time out to do things which make a difference to others, makes US feel good, so its SELF-ISH as well as SELF-LESS.

Everyone's a winner!